Dear Santa....

I am 20 years old. Most people stop believing in Santa by now. They quit thinking the man in the big red suit is real and start worrying about what to get other people and what they are going to get. I, however, am not one of those people. I still believe in Santa. Which is why I just wrote him a letter. Normally my letters to Santa are all about what I want and possessions I need, but this year I wrote about something different I wrote a wish. A wish that I won't share due to it's personal nature, but I firmly believe this wish will be granted. The idea I am trying to get at is never stop believing in magic! Sure, it may seem childish to some but to me that's what keeps us from becoming robots. Beliefs keep us rooted while also allowing us to fly. Magic keeps us believing. It keeps us young. So believe. Believe in the joy of Santa. Belief in his elves and his workshop. Just believe! 

This has become one of my new favorite songs. I think it really embodies the spirit of Santa and what he can do. It is also a tribute to the troops who so valiantly fight for our freedom and sacrifice holidays away from their families to spend that time fighting. I have a brother in the Air Force who, luckily, gets to be home with his family and us for Christmas. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5leMiif4pM&feature=related Enjoy the song! :) It makes me cry (in a good way) every time I watch it. 

So, I guess what I want you to take out this is never stop believing. Don't lose the magic so many people call childish. Write a letter to Santa. Wish for worthwhile things and never be afraid to believe! 

Share a Christmas smile, after all, no one lies a frowny face! :) 

Your "Sole" Mate

So, after talking about relationships, I decided to make a metaphor about shoes... I know this may sound silly (I just woke up so don't judge me) I hate that everyone complains about not finding someone. First, have some patience! Maybe that's not what is supposed to happen in your life! Calm down, forget about searching and someone will come along. It takes time!
Anyways, back to the metaphor. So this is WAY cheesed up, but believe me it makes sense. Think about shoes. Some people like certain types of shoes and only wear them. Others have their favorite types. Think about it. You know someone who only wears their TOMS or only wears flip-flops, or loves their one pair of shoes. Some people like multiple types of shoes or have more than one favorite. Some people even dislike wearing shoes! (that's me) Now you have an idea of how much shoes are important  let me tell you how they relate to relationships. Each of us have a pair of shoes that we love, or a style of shoes that we love. This is like that "right" person we all look for and talk about. We have worn shoes our entire life. Some people find the type of shoes they love and want to wear the rest of their life early. Some people find them later. Some people don't ever find them. Life was not meant for us to be equal. It was not made for everyone to have the same experiences. It's okay that you haven't found "the one" yet. It's okay that you're getting your heart broken. Cheer up! The right person is out there for you. The important thing is that you are trying on different types of shoes to find the one you like the best. Your "Sole" mate is out there, so keep on looking. You'll find them!

No one likes a frowny face, change it to a smile (you get more dates if you smile)

LOVE YOURSELF.

You know what I think is the hardest thing in life? Loving yourself. Some people may disagree with me but there are a whole lot more that will agree. I can honestly say that I love myself. Why and how I came to love myself can be discussed at a later date. Through this process of learning to love myself there are a few things in life that I have learned. A few things that have kept me going when I really didn't feel like I was worth loving myself. Those times when life gets you down all you need is a little pick me up. So take this exercise and do it. It may seem dumb at first, silly, dorky, cheesy if you will, but I PROMISE (I don't break promises) that if you do it you will begin to love yourself more. Start by looking in the mirror. Naturally people find things they dislike when they look in the mirror. Well not you! You are going to say that you can do it. You are going to pick things you like about yourself. You are going to build yourself up. I won't lie this is gonna be hard at first. Real hard. Especially if you have spent so much time looking in that mirror and saying things you dislike. Start with your appearance and move inward. Start with one thing and move to five or more. I promise that by doing this you will begin to love yourself. It will change your life. Do it. Please. Just try!

Still not sure of the process? Here's a video to show you just exactly what it should look like! :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qR3rK0kZFkg

Remember, the greatest thing about you is your smile! So turn that frown upside down and let the world see the beauty you bring to it! :)

Happy Happy Joy Joy! - Attitude makes all the difference

What makes you happy? I mean really truly makes you happy? I'm not talking happy that lasts 5 minute happy, I am talking genuine, long-lasting happy. Happiness that can take years to build. Happiness that lasts a long time. Happiness that leaves you with a smile that just won't go away. Can't think of anything? That's alright. This happiness can be hard to come by, or it can be the easiest thing to find. It all depends on you. That's right you. You are in control of your life. You are the only one that can determine your attitude. Think about it. Say you are in a giant crowd walking around with a milkshake in your hand. You slip on the ground and fall and spill milkshake all over you. Everyone within a 20 foot radius can see this and about 57 people start busting out in laughter at your expense. Now, there are two things you can do in this situation. The first is to be upset, get bent out of shape and be embarrassed. The second is stand up, laugh it off, and move forward knowing you put a smile on those people's faces. Your attitude just determined the outcome of that event and your happiness level. The person who can learn to laugh it off and turn the situation into something positive is the person who is probably most successful in life. It's a skill that is hard to learn. Real hard to learn, but once mastered can make all the difference in a happy life and one that well, just isn't full of enjoyment. Anyways... let's go back to happiness. What makes you truly happy? If you don't have an answer to this go find one! It's okay to have more than one thing that makes you happy. Shoot, I've got a list a mile long. Right now, the thing that makes me happy is people. People are awesome. Especially people who know you and who say things that just make your day. I certainly have a whole lot of people like this in my life and I am glad that I do.
So this blog's been kind of all over the place, but the things to take out of it are check your attitude. Like I said earlier, your attitude can change your life so make sure it's positive and the outcome of any situation will be changed in a happy way! Second take away is find what makes you happy and be happy. Truly truly happy. As always, no one likes a frowny face, so change it to a smile. :)

BE YOU.

Sometimes in life we get into a path. We start to be who the world expects us to be. We start to be who we think we need to be. We start to become a person who fits into a mold. We start to lose ourselves. This is natural. Everyone feels like they can't be, or aren't being themselves at one point or another. It's okay to do this, as long as we find ourselves again. Recently I felt like I was lost. I really felt like I was becoming something that was not me. Something I did not want to be because it wasn't me. I got told once that I was weird. Surprisingly that did not bother me one bit. I was in elementary school at the time. Being told you are weird at such a young age does something to you, at least for me it did. You may think it ruined my self-esteem, but it didn't. It made me stronger. I took this and formed an identity. I gave myself permission to be me. The person who told me I was weird was my mom. She gave me that permission. She let me go with who I was. She helped me to become me. My message today is to do just that. Let yourself be you! You are the only one you can be you! I mean seriously think about that. I cannot be you, your sister cannot be you, the guy across the street cannot be you; only you can be you! So do it, because, as I was recently reminded by a good friend, "You are super awesome at what you do, and that is being you!" So, be the fruitloop in the box of cheerios. Be the  different person you want to be. Be your own kind of beautiful, but above all else, Just BE YOU.

As always, No one likes a frowny face, change it to a smile--- a smile that fits your face and is unique to you! :)

Here is a picture that I LOVE. My mom says it's me, which is the greatest compliment anyone could ask for in my opinion! :) Be the color in a dull world. Be the fruitloop. Shine like no one else but you can!

And here is one of my favorite songs. I see your true colors, let them shine! :) 

I am thankful for...

Well Happy Thanksgiving everyone! :) Today I am purely going to do a selfish post about how blessed I am. I am thankful for SO many things. I think I'll just list them instead of writing out sentences... :)

I am thankful for:

baby laughter

my niece

my nephew

my other nephew

the sky

Nature

Zion National Park

My roommates

My mommy

My daddy

Skyler

Brooke

Casey

Kyle

Ashley

Kevin

Amanda

Kattie

My roommates from last year

the way grass feels on barefeet

toes

Area Government

SLC AG

Central Campus AG [10-11]

USU

Logan, UT

Snow

the way snowflakes look when they fall

Autism

education

tv

technology

curling irons

friends

Hugs when you are upset

baby kisses

sticky hands

the way my nephew says my name

baby smiles

hugs from strangers

the ability to cook

home-cooked meals

chocolate

white teeth

leaves on the ground

Pokemon

Mario Kart

Blue hair

five fingers

colorful things

Frisbee

Toys

Gnomes

Lily 

the gospel

Lime Green 

blankets

cuddling

nail polish

fireplaces

water bottles

Opportunities

life

clouds that look like turtles

LARPing

Zombies

shopping without spending money

cleaning

yardwork

powertools

green apples

sharing my talents

MUSIC

listening to my nephew sing

ears, eyes, tastebuds

broccoli

The list could go on for ages... and I very well might add to it later :) 

Love is in the air... :)

Love. It is such a powerful thing. The word means so much. It portrays a feeling that is so wildly searched for and so often found. When a lot of people think of love the first type they think of is romantic love, but have you ever thought about the other types of love? The love you feel for and from friends, the love you feel towards and from your family, love you feel for people you don't know, just all types of love?
Love is so powerful. Have you ever been having a bad day and called someone or talked to someone who simply said, "I love you and it will be okay." I have and I can tell you that this one phrase seriously calms every fear I have. It makes me feel empowered. It makes me feel like I can do everything because I have someone who loves me. Love is so powerful. It has the power to change lives. I can tell you from personal experience that once I learned that I was love and really realized that people love me I was able to become a better person. Love is very fragile. It is a strong word with a lot of meaning and it shouldn't be used lightly, but it should be used. By loving others you allow yourself the opportunity to build connections. Connections that will help you when you need it most. Love is an important part of everything we do. I love love. I really do. It has been such a force in my life and will continue to be. I cannot wait for that day when the man I choose to marry tells me he loves me and I can feel that love and then reciprocate it. I treasure each moment I am with my family and I can tell them I love them. I treasure each time I am with friends, and though we may not say "I love you" to each other, I know they love me and I love them as well. I treasure the little things that add up to love. Basically, I just love love. I love everything about it and my advice for today is just to love and realize you are loved. If you do that there will be no reason to have a frowny face and you will be all smiles! :)

Everybody Makes Mistakes

"Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days" 

If you don't feel like reading through this all, go to the bottom. I've shortened it for you. Hahaha :) 

I really don't care that this is from a Hannah Montana song, it is what this blog is gonna be all about. I surely have had some very intense experiences with this recently. Now, I am TERRIBLE at dealing with mistakes. I hate them. Hahaha They drive me nuts. I don't like the fact that I am not perfect. I know that sounds silly but it is how I feel about mistakes. Funny thing is everything I said is totally dumb. I had to face my issues with mistakes this week and I learned a few things about myself and mistakes and life. The first step is admitting you have made a mistake. This one isn't the hardest for me, but it sure is for some people. For me, I would rather take all the credit for the mistake than have anyone else involved but that isn't always the case. This week especially I learned that other people are there for you. I am very lucky to have a wonderful friend in my life who knows how to deal with me and who, whether he knows it or not, has a very calm demeanor which just rubs off on me. I find that when you make a mistake it is best to talk to someone who will support you instead of demean you. I definitely did this. I didn't know who else to talk to, so I called my mom. She reassured me that it was going to be okay that I was not a dumb person and that I just needed to calm down. The friend I talked about earlier did the same thing. He had plenty of reason to lecture me, but he didn't instead he just gave me a hug, said it would be alright and was there. I had to go talk to someone higher up in position because of this mistake I made and I was terrified. I was so afraid I would burst into tears, but even this person calmed me. At one point he even said, "I apologize for the miscommunication." This statement blew my mind. I was so taken back by how the people I was around helped me feel better about myself. I actually left this meeting feeling better about my day. It was so cool. There are some very interesting things I am taking away from this experience. The first seems to be a reoccurring theme throughout my blog. This is that people really do care. People care a lot more than you think they do. I am constantly surprised by how many people honestly care. Surround yourself with good people and you will be very surprised by how you get treated. The next thing I am taking from this experience is that it's never as bad as you think it will be. As people, I think we naturally assume the worst when a mistake is made. I know I surely do. 99% of the time, the worse that I think will happen NEVER does. So don't sweat it. It will be okay. That is the third point. It will be okay. How many mistakes have you made that you didn't learn from? How many mistakes have you made that you dwell on daily? There may be some big ones in life that you do think about, but the majority of our mistakes become the past. I certainly will be able to look back on the mistake I made this week and know that it shaped me to be who I am. 

Readers Digest Version!

I really truly believe that you can make mistakes and get over them. That is why we are not perfect. If we never messed up we could never learn. So make sure you don't beat yourself up over the things you can't fix. I promise it will be okay, and if you do not believe me, go ahead and find a good friend who will give you a hug and let you know it'll be okay, because after all friends are our greatest support! :) 

Don't let your mistakes weigh you down! Life is going to be okay, just remember, no one likes a frowny face so change it to a smile! :) 

Hakuna Matata... What a wonderful phrase!

So, we all know the words to the song from the Lion King, but have you ever really sat and thought about the real meaning of Hakuna Matata? It means no worries. Now, I know it is impossible not to never worry. Worry is a natural part of life. The issue is when worry becomes excessive. When worry  overcomes us. When worry takes over. That is where we run into issues. That happened to me today. I have a HUGE test tomorrow. I was worrying like crazy crazy crazy! I was crying it was that intense. I let the worry overcome me. I let it take over. Then I remembered this book. My dad teaches a "class" per say for teenagers that involves public speaking and confidence as well as life skills. He gives the kids this book titled "Stop Worrying and Start Living" I am not gonna lie, I only got to chapter 5 but last night I picked it up again for some reason and I am really glad that I did. The part I read gave instructions on how to fix a solution instead of just worrying about it. Tonight I totally used these steps and I can tell you my complete attitude got changed! :)
They are 1. Write down what you are worrying about 2. Write down possible solutions to the problem         3. Decide which solution will be best 4. Take the solution and DO IT.
Seriously this totally helped me! I will illustrate with my example of my test. Obviously, 1. I am worrying about my test and failing it 2. I can study all night, get no sleep and stress like crazy, Or I can study as much as I can tonight, go to sleep and wake up and study, Or I can put the studying away for right now (since it's stressing me so bad) do something enjoyable then sleep and wake up tomorrow and finish studying like crazy! 3. I decided to do the last one, put the studying away, enjoy the night, sleep and study as much as I can tomorrow. 4. I left my room and I came out to talk about music, socialize, watch some Hulu and enjoy my night. After this blog, I am going to go to sleep. Then tomorrow I will wake up!
Now, you don't have to do this process on paper, you can think through it. Just give it a try next time you are worried. It will help I promise! :)
No one likes a frowny face, change it to a smile! :)

Recognize yourself!

Well, as I sit procrastinating studying for my least favorite class, I feel like writing about recognition. Most people don't know this but I HATE recognition. Seriously cannot stand it. I didn't used to be this way but then I just felt so overly recognized and like my real efforts were being forgotten. I dislike it now. A lot. Most of the time I won't even read what people write or what is said if I feel it overly reeks of recognition. Now, don't get me wrong, I love reassurance. I like to be told I am doing a good job and I like to acknowledge others for what they do. I love recognizing others for their work. Seriously it's like my favorite. I do this because it takes the attention off of me and it puts it on who I feel like it really belongs on, everyone else. I also realize that I am a minority. I am one of the few who don't like to be recognized and I am okay with that. I may be a minority in this, but anyways the point of this blog is really to learn to recognize yourself. Let yourself believe that you are worth it. Let yourself believe that you can be who you want to be. Tell yourself you are doing a great job. Tell yourself that you are a great person. Believe in  yourself and all else will fall into place! :)
So advice for today? Recognize yourself. :)

Oh, and PS, here's a poem I wrote...

A smile is a friend to all

It is easy to do whether you are big or you are small. 

Giving a smile is fun to do.

If you give me a smile, I'll give you one too!

By putting a smile on your face

You can make the world a better place!

No one likes a frowny face, change it to a smile!

It's just a balancing act

So, my favorite class this semester is titled balancing work and family. I absolutely love this class. I love the practical skills it teaches. Yeah, I don't have kids yet, shoot, I am not even married, nor am I close to being married, but I have learned to apply the skills they teach to my life and it surely does help.
One of our lectures last week got me thinking. The teacher read something about being super mom. She said that that is one of the greatest problems women have is trying to do everything perfect. I applied this to my own life and tried to think of each role I have and I try to hard to be superwoman. The answer I came up with is no. I don't take on anything I know I cannot handle. I give each segment of my life the time it needs. Do somethings (like AG) need more time than other things? Sure do. But the fact is I try to devote the correct amount of time to everything. Am I perfect at this? Heck no! But I try to do my best and that is all anyone can ask for.
Another thing that goes along with balance is knowing when to say no. I get told all the time that I can't say no. That is false. I can say no and I do say no, I just choose what to say no to. I know myself and I know my limits. I know what I can handle to do in a week and I know what I cannot do in a week. My life is my own and it gets handled in that manner. So, know your limits. You are the best version of you and even if everyone else thinks you take on too much, if you are devoting your time to each thing in the correct manner, nothing else will matter!
So advice for today? Learn to balance. Don't try to be super at a billion things, just be super at what you need to be super at. Spend the right amount of time on each role in your life. Spend your time wisely. Know when to say no, and trust yourself in your abilities to do what you know you can do. :) Remember that time is important and so is balance. Work on what you need to work on and keep doing what you are great at doing.  And as you do all of this, do it with a smile, because, as always no one likes a frowny face! :)

F is for Friends who do stuff together!

I absoutely have terrible luck with friends. At least I did growing up. But guess what? That changed when I moved to college. I have made life changing friends up here at USU. I think I will try and add pictures and all that jazz to emphasize just how great my friends are! :)

 This is Sammy Dean. She is one of my very best friends. 

We were roommates last year and I just LOVE her! :) 

 Meet Michaela. She and I shared a reoom and are friends by default. I am glad I met her and know I can trust her :) 

 First off, these people are AMAZING. I love each and everyone of them! 

This is Central Campus AG from last year and man oh man. Most greatest awesomeest people ever!!!

 Oh man! What a great day this was! The 315ers are seriously amazing! :)

Jaret Danger Wilson. He is a stud!

 We really did become a family last year! :) So glad each of these girls are in my life! 

And that Jaret was always there for me! :) 

 My best friends from last year. Amberly is on the right then Sammy then me! I just love em all! :)

 These ladies I met this summer and they helped me through a lot! This is when we went hiking through the narrows and I lost a contact while swimming! So much fun! :)

My Pondersa Family! These people are each great in their own way!

:)  

 Amberly, Nicole, and I. Man. We had some fun times! :) They helped make my freshman year great!

 Well, we know we can't make fried ice cream hahaha! 

The three amigos! Yeah, we rock! 

Tasha, Amberly and Perla!

 Killer Chickens. Need I say more? 

This girl is HILARIOUS. Love her. 

 Taylor Smith. She kept me sane this summer! :) 

 Favorite friends is right. This is Monique McElvany. She is my very very best friend. I love her SO much. I seriously would NOT be able to get through the day without her in my life! I LOVE her!!! 

 Remember how I said some of these friends are life changing? This man certainly is! 

Kenneth James Fryar-Ludwig. 

The kind of guy that would call you at one in the morning to make sure you were okay. 

The kind of guy who treated EVERYONE with such amazing respect and kindness that he never had people who didn't like him. 

The kind of man that was willing to change his life around just so that he could serve the lord for two years. Kenny is one of the greatest examples to me and he always will be. I love him, and am so glad he came into my life and helped make a difference! :) 

 Me and Amberly again :) 

This is Umut. He helped me through my senior year. I am so glad he is in my life! 

Ich liebe dich, Umut! :) 

Apparently this kid and I don't have any pictures together? That should change. hahaha!

This is Brice Robert Colby. 

He has become another one of those life- changing friends. The kind you wanna keep around because they help you be a better person. 

This is a drawing Brice's friend did of him and it's like my favorite. I like it because Brice and I are very similar in many ways. It's sometimes scary how alike we can be. 

I've come to find that friends tend to have the same likes and dislikes as you and he and I surely match up in a  lot of these. We both HATE shoes, love nerdy things, and LOVE frisbee. He taught me to throw a frisbee and I am pretty sure that's when I decided I wanted to be his friend! :) hahaha

I love this picture! It includes some of my SLC AG members, some SLC staff and a whole lot of our true personalities showing :)

These people are the reason I do what I do. They are why I work so hard to have a successful AG. They are why I am AG president (literally and figuratively) and they are some of the greatest examples of wonderful people I have ever met!

I LOVE this picture. It cracks me up! Jordan Ames is one fiesty little thing. She knows how to have fun, be outrageous, but be a friend. She is quite the great lady and I am glad I know her :) 

My Wasatch Warriors!

Man, the people in this picture are all just SO awesome! They live in the same building as me and they are so fun! I love the community we have and the person they help me become! :)

Now, some of my friends are not mentioned. Mostly because we do not have pictures together! One I certainly need to talk about is Zakk Lanphear. This kid is crazy. He is so fun to be around and he always puts a smile on my face. I love hangin out with him and I love that he takes me for who I am :) 

Debryn Saunders, we sure do have some pictures together but well they are hidden! I just love her. She is my "RA" but she is my friend. I know that I was supposed to live in Wasatch Hall because I was supposed to be her roommate!

Mandy Maughan. Man she's a keeper. So much fun to be around like all the time. I just love her and I hope she knows that! :) 

Kaydee, Tenille, Jordan. These three are so much fun. Seriously love living with them. It's such a great thing to live with people who make you laugh! :) 

If you didn't get mentioned, know I still love you, I just have to take my lunch break now! hahaha! :) 

So, advice for today? Quit wondering when you are going to get that "best friend" and allow yourself to realize the great people who are all around you. They are there, just look. I sure am blessed with my friends!

As always, no one likes a frowny face, so share a smile and you may just meet someone new to add to your list! :) 

Confused? Me too.

Recently in my life I have felt so much confusion. Seriously SO much confusion. It's been weird for me because I am normally the girl with her head on her shoulders and a confident sparkle in her eyes. I didn't know what the heck was wrong until today. Today I realized that I wasn't realizing my worth. I was busy worrying about how much I could accomplish on my to-do list and not about why I was doing the things on it. I wasn't doing them because I wanted to but because I had to. I lost my passion and I lost sight of the love I have for life. Sounds like I am one of those cheesy, overly cliche people doesn't it? Well I am and I love that. I forgot the important thing is why I am doing what I do and who I am doing it for. My resolve is to find that passion again and that excitement and continue it! :)

CONTAINS RELIGION:
I never want to sound pushy or like I am forcing my beliefs on anyone, but it would be a discredit to my Savior and the person I am if I did not acknowledge how learning I am a child of God again has helped me. I go to church every Sunday. I pray each night before bed and I read my scriptures often, but sometimes I forget this wonderful little fact that I am a daughter of God. Today at church, I was pretty much slapped in the face by it. Every lesson, every talk, every prayer was about how I am a daughter of God and how I am loved. This is another resolve I have. I need to realize how influential this knowledge can be in my life and embrace and accept it. I am a child of God. I need to live this way and I surely will! :)

PS, if you want to know this truth, or more about how I know I am a child of God, go to www.mormon.org and find out, or just ask me. Either way it may be worth your time! :)

So, piece of take away for today's blog? Find your passion. Focus on why you are doing things instead of the fact that they must be done. Learn the truths that make you you. Follow your beliefs and find out what truly matters. And as always, keep on smiling; no one likes a frowny face! :)

You are Beautiful.

Body image.  What does this mean to you? Is it how you view yourself? Is it how you view your life? Is it how other view you? What does this mean? To me, body image is a combination of all of these, but it really all comes down to mostly one thing and that is how you feel about yourself.
Now, I know how hard it is to live in a society that portrays perfectly shaped, beautifully sculpted people and not feel like you fail because you aren't as pretty as them. There have been very long periods of time in my life where I have felt that failure. Where I haven't believed in myself as a beautiful person, but over time, that changed. I can now look in the mirror and call myself beautiful despite the fact that I do not wear size 0 pants. I can smile at myself and know that I am a good looking girl despite my less than pearly white teeth. What is portrayed to be beautiful in society is not what really is beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so allow yourself to see your beauty. There are some things I have learned in life that have helped me to be confident in who I am and be able to see myself as beautiful. The first is to stop calling yourself names. How many times have you woken up looked in the mirror and said "ew." Stop that right now. Don't focus on what you don't like about yourself, focus on what you do like. Give yourself compliments. When your hair looks good, tell yourself that. It is okay to admit to yourself that you have great features!
The second thing to do is accept compliments from others. Now, I have a terrible time accepting recognition, but I have learned that accepting compliments when others give them to you is a good thing. You then begin to remember them and are happier. This also helps you build stronger relationships with people.
Next, you need to stop talking and start doing. This may be the hardest step, but you can do it. If you don't like how much you weigh, then exercise and eat right more. Don't sit around complaining and hoping the pounds will magically melt away, get off your couch and do something about it. Take the initiative to change what you feel needs to change to make yourself feel better.
Then, you must never never never compare. You cannot be the same person as your roommate, or Jennifer Lopez, or anyone. You are you. Learn to accept that fact and then go with it. When you stop wishing you looked like someone else and start recognizing the amazing things about the way that you look, life will improve.
Lastly, remember that you are special. I know this gets made fun of a lot, but seriously you are special. You are special because you are you. There is only one Tasha Mae Killian in the entire world, the entire universe. There is only one of me, so I am going to try to make that Tasha the best she can be. There is only one of you in the world, so accept yourself for who you are, what you look like and move forward because the role you play in this world is you, not someone else.

And for my favorite tip, no matter what you look like, a smile can make your look a thousand times better because no one likes a frowny face! :)

The secret to making friends.

So, this blog is going to be about something I have struggled with my entire life. That is friends. I don't know why I have had such a tough experience with friendships, but I have. Recently I have been thinking about why friendships are important and how to make them. Like I said, I am not the best at this but I 'm gonna give it a shot.
The first part of making friends is talking. I know this sounds like a duh answer but you would be surprised by how many people don't know that is part of making friends. You can't just walk up to someone and become best friends. You can't even go to someone you've known for a year and be friends. You have to talk to each other. I mean really talk. Get to know the person. They may not be willing to tell you a whole lot, but they can tell you things that you can relate to and in return you can tell them things that they can relate to. When you have a real conversation with someone you are beginning a friendship.
Next you need to laugh at their jokes. Now, don't be super outrageous, but if there is something funny said, realize it is okay to laugh. I have a theory that everyone wants to be funny. We all want to be laughed at... hahaha ... that sounded bad, but we do. When we say a funny joke, we want someone to acknowledge it. So, laugh when someone says something funny. It will make their day and in return they will laugh at you!
Next you need to make them a priority. Prioritizing is seriously one of the hardest things for me to do, but I am starting to learn that in many ways people come first. It's alright to sacrifice an hour of your sleeping time to help a friend with a presentation. It's okay to share your dinner with someone who is looking for a pal. It's okay to put off studying  to play a short game of Frisbee. It's okay to make the people you want to be a priority, become a priority. If you learn that people can come first people will realize that you care an in turn they will care for you.
Last you need to learn that everyone matters. There are people who have a very small role in the world that still matter. On top of realizing that everyone matters, realize that you matter. Mattering means a lot. It means that someone cares about you. This is true for every single person. There is ALWAYS someone who cares. It may not feel like it, but there is. By realizing that everyone matters you begin to see people for who they are instead of dwelling on their flaws. It's such a great thing when someone thanks you for caring about them. If you begin to see the worth of people and realize that they matter, they will feel your care and be drawn to you.

Now, going back to what I said at the beginning. I am, by no means, the expert on friendships, but I do know how to let people know they are important and someone cares and that is what a friendship is all about. So, next time you meet someone try using some of these skills. See how it works. And remember, the best way to be coming friends with someone is to never have a frowny face. Always share a smile! :)

The Time, The Time, Who Has the Time? :)

Time. Such a small and simple 4 letter word, but such a large meaningful thing to take in. It is what is on my mind today. In fact, there was a very strong thought in my mind that I could not go without thinking about. This thought was, "It's time to manage your time." I have felt a bit stretched out with all the things I have to do and the amount of time I have to do it in. This has become a serious problem. I wish I could tell you how I can fix this, but I really don't know yet. It is something I plan to work on and in the future I will give you an update.
Another thing that has been on my mind is how precious time really is. If I spend ten minutes on something that is a time waster...facebook... then that is ten minutes I can never get back. Really makes you think about what is important. Recently there have been a few things that I have had to choose between. For example, do I stay up late building relationships with friends, or go to bed and allow myself time to feel refreshed? It's a tough thing to be constantly aware of what you are doing with your time, but try to think about it. How much happier could you be if you decided to take a walk instead of playing video games? Or to study your assignment instead of stalking on Facebook. This is also something I need to work on. Life goes by quickly, so really live each moment in a worthwhile way. (PS, I hate when people say live each moment as your last because honestly if this was my last moment I would be having some epic adventure and in all reality your life cannot be made up of very epic constant moments, so if you live each moment in a worthwhile way then your life will be fulfilling)
My last thought on time, let it be on your side. Time is something I used to hate. I am not very patient and I still have issues waiting, but sometimes waiting is necessary. If you have never stood in line and waited for something you really wanted and then been totally satisfied with that waiting, you can never appreciate that thing fully. Also, you cannot appreciate instant gratification to its fullest if you have never waited. Waiting can be fun. If you are waiting for something big, enjoy life and the lessons it teaches while you are waiting. If you are waiting for something simple, learn to enjoy this wait by entertaining yourself, meeting new people, and just enjoying having time to anticipate the good. Time can be your friend. Rushing and fast-pacedness (totally made that word up) are not always the best. So enjoy the wait and time will become your ally in life.

Time is interesting. It is hard to manage, hard to prioritize, hard to make worthwhile, but can be your ally, friend, and teacher in life. Don't hate time and time won't hate you. Realize that it's time to manage your time and begin realizing what you need to do in order to make your time is spent in the best way possible.
Remember, no one likes a frowny face. Turn it around and smile some more! :)

Two posts in one week, say what?

If you're like me and can't read tons cuz you get bored, feel free to skip down to the advice at the bottom. I won't be offended. I promise!

So, I don't have much time before I rush off to pass my German test, but I just wanna share a few thoughts regarding a cemetery. It is Halloween and all. So recently I have been constantly getting asked if I was alright. At first it was by like a billion people. Then it was by just the few who know me very well. For some reason all these questions lead me to two realizations. The first one was that something really was off, despite my answer and the second was that people truly care. Those are the two topics for today. 

So, Something being off: Well I knew that something was missing, but i didn't know what. It was really hard to figure out because, honestly that has never happened to me before. Well, as I was thinking about how to get back on track and what was missing, I realized something. I hadn't been doing one of the things that makes me the happiest. I learned in class a couple weeks ago that we each have eight basic needs in life, but to go along with that we each have things in our life that we need. Now, I'm not talking needs like the I need to eat a banana before work everyday needs I am talking like I need to have me time or I need to talk with a certain friend needs. My personal needs had to do with reading. Sounds weird right? Well it's not. I love to read uplifting materials. Generally these materials are religious, but not always. I read self-help books, joke books, and just positive things that put a smile on my face. Recently, because of my busy life, I have neglected that reading. Well no more. If you love doing something and it makes you happy then do it. Don't say it's not a priority because it is. You are a priority. Sure there are other things in life that are also important but you need to realize you are also important and that there are things you need to do for yourself. :)

Now, onto the second. People really do care: A few years back I thought that I knew what it meant to have someone care about you. I had a friend that cared and made sure I had what I needed and that I was happy, but there was something missing. What was missing was feeling. Recently, I have had multiple friends questions me and how I am doing. They showed that they cared. It was really a great thing for me to realize. Caring is great. Along with knowing others care you need to care for yourself as well. I always set super high standards for myself and it always brings me down. I realized today that no one expects me to be perfect. No one expects me to be anything other than the best me I can be, and that my friends, is a great feeling. 

So things to take away from this today (this will be helpful if you didn't feel like reading all that jazz)

1. Do something you like to do. Don't worry about how it will effect the other areas of your life, or what people will think because that doesn't matter. What matters is you. If you are doing something that makes you happy, then everything else will fall into place. So get your priorities straight and realize that you need to take care of yourself as well. 

2. Let people care. Let them into your life and let them ask if you are alright. Realize that there is emotion behind this and the emotion is concern. It is not a stale, annoying, or invalidated question. Appreciate the care and accept it. 

2.5. Care about yourself. Realize that you cannot do it all one-hundred percent perfectly. Realize that no one cares if you can't do it perfectly and no one expects you to. Don't give yourself limits you cannot achieve. Allow yourself to realize that the best is all anyone wants, and you doing your best is all anyone needs. Be your best self and that will always be good enough. 

Last but never least, no one likes a frowny face, so smile. If you do, you will be more atttractive, happier, and have more friends... and that fellow bloggers, is all anyone can ask for! :)

SLC AG is Poppin'

Well a whole lot has happened in my life recently. I was elected as Area Government (on campus housing student council type thing...) president and have been SO busy! I sure do love doing this! I have probably the greatest advisor in the history of advisors. This is no exaggeration. Brice Colby is his name, and zombies are his game... hahaha! He is not only one way cool kid, but one very entertaining person. Despite how much I tease him about different things, he sure is one of the greatest, most put together leaders I have ever met. I am so excited to finally get into the nitty gritty of AG this year and start to become the best leader I can be while helping those in my AG also become the greatest leaders they can. :) Basically SLC AG is poppin! :) Speaking of AG, there is a lovely little thing we do in the fall called the AG retreat. It is one of the most life changing, eye opening, emotionally draining weekends you will ever live through. I know this sounds super not like a lot of fun, but it is actually quite the opposite. This is my second AG retreat I have attended and I really was sort of confused after leaving it. I really didn't know how to feel. Last year I was so uplifted and ready to move on and this year I was just confused. It took a while... okay like maybe 6 hours... after leaving to help me feel that uplifted feeling. Emotions are so crazy. They are always there and always so very prominent. You can feel so much happiness, sadness, or anger and then five minutes later feel the complete opposite. I used to say I wish we didn't feel. I wish that we didn't have emotions, but they are necessary. You could never care for someone without emotions. Never learn to control anger. Never learn to suppress jealousy. Never learn to   love or be happy. Most importantly, we would never learn to or be able to connect with other people. Emotions are necessary. They make us who we are and allow us to be what we need to be.

That was a tangent I really didn't need to go off on. Basically after the AG retreat I have a few new goals. Those goals include getting to truly know people. Less poor me and more helping. More real friends and less superficial ones. Less hidden emotion and more shared feelings. Less hostility and more friendliness. Write poetry again. Less distractions and more focus. Basically there is still a whole lot I need to work on, a whole lot that can help me improve the person that I am and a whole lot of emotions that I need to accept and allow to happen.

So, piece of advice for staying happy this blog is, don't shut yourself off. Don't close yourself down. Show some emotion. Share a problem with a friend. Allow people to care about you. You cannot get through life alone so don't try. Even if you think there is no one out there who cares, there always is. Next time someone asks "what's wrong?" or "Are you alright?" give them an answer. Let them be your friend. You will be happier if you do this and that my friends is a promise.

As always, I hope you enjoyed my random array of thoughts and emotions. Remember, No one likes a frowny face!

When all else fails, pretend you are happy!

You know those days where you just can't get a break? You miss the bus, you fail a test, you forget your lunch, you lose your keys. Everything just keeps piling up against you and it seems like there is no way to be positive. Multiply those days by 7 and you get my last week. It's funny. All of this stuff just kept happening but I didn't feel in a bad mood. I felt happy. It was like I was just floating through life. Strange, I know... but think about this. How many times have you had a terrible day and it stayed terrible because you dwelt on it. I know when I think about everything that is going wrong all I can imagine is the bad. When I smile and pretend to be happy I feel better. So next time you are down, try smiling. Even if you don't wanna it will make you feel better. Remember, no one likes a frowny face! :)

Faith in Every Footstep

Faith. It is what holds me together. It is what makes me believe I can do everything. It is was makes me happy. My faith is the reason I do what I do. It is the reason I am who I am. Today in Relief Society, we had a lesson about faith. I was struck with the thought that faith is an everyday thing, and with the realization of how faith has altered the course of my life. At the beginning of my Freshman year of college, I thought I had it all figured out. Boy was I wrong. Not only was I not going the direction Heavenly Father wanted me to go, I was not even noticing I was doing things that led me from his plan. It wasn't until I began questioning my major choice that I began to see the savior's influence in my life and began to realize that maybe the path I had for me wasn't the path he had for me. You know how they say faith and fear can't reside in the same being well I began to realize that. It took a lot to get over my fear. A fear I still have occasionally. A fear that is still so real. The fear of the unknown. I was not letting the Savior guide my life because I was afraid what he wanted for me wasn't what I wanted for myself... and boy was I right. At the end of February I got a spiritual "slap in the face" not only was I not on the path my Savior needed me to be on, he had bigger and better things I could only dream of. This is when I decided to go on a mission. This decision kind of changed my life. I don't think the same anymore. I always heard my guy friends talk about going on a mission and how it would just fit into their plans but I never really thought about how it would fit into mine. Now I know. I know that it will fit into my plans, but more importantly it will fit into the Lord's plan for me.
Whether you are religious or not, life is what you make it. Think about the end result. If what you are doing and where you are going isn't where you want to be headed, then change directions and go another way. Don't fear the unknown. Have faith in your decisions and know that you can do what is right for you. When you are doing what you feel you should be doing, that is when you will be at your happiest. Take it from someone who changed her entire life around because of one little feeling. Life is meant to be enjoyed so enjoy it and always remember, NO ONE LIKES A FROWNY FACE, CHANGE IT TO A SMILE!!! :)

So you had a bad day...

Hey y'all.
So today I just have been having a hard day. My textbook isn't here and I have a quiz on it. I miss my friends who are on missions. I miss my family. I ate alone at the marketplace. I  basically just was in a sour mood all day! No bueno right? Well because of this "bad day" a question came to my mind. The question is what makes you feel better. As I asked myself this and I tried to come up with an idea, a few things came to mind. The first was my friends. I am very lucky to have tons of people who care about me and who want me to be happy. The second thing that came to my mind is music. There is nothing in my life a good old country song cannot reverse. Seriously, I know it's cheesy, but music is a HUGE part of my life. I love listening to it, especially country. Another bright spot that can always make me happy is sleep. Yeah, I know that makes me sound like a lazy bum, but seriously if you are not sleeping enough you are just gonna be cranky! (At least I am) Lastly, I realized smiling just helps. Seriously. If you are upset try smiling. Not only does it burn more calories, it puts you in a better mood instantly. It's like you can actually trick your brain into being happy again just by smiling! Great huh? After realizing what could make me happy, I utilized them. I talked to a really good friend, I blasted some country, I took a nap, and then, I smiled. Smiling is the greatest medicine in my opinion. It rocks majorly!! :) So try it. Next time you have a bad day, smile. Take a nap. Blast some music. Talk to your friends. Or do whatever you can to change your mood because, as always, No one likes a frowny face!

The beginning of the rest of my LIFE.

You know those moments when you pause and think, Is this really happening? Am I really here? I have those ALL the time. Recently, I have had a lot of changes and opportunities that I felt blessed to have. After spending the summer at Zion Ponderosa Ranch and Resort, I have learned a few lessons. One of those is do not let anyone put you down. Another thing I learned is to be positive even when everyone around you is not. It was a great experience. There was a lot of things that I know I would not have been able to do had I not been there. I really miss the place, but civilization is good too.
After Ponderosa, school began. It's gonna be a great year, but a hard one. I am taking 12 credits and 2 institute classes. I will be working. I may take more institute classes. I am taking German, Balancing work and family, psychology, rape aggression defense and water aerobics. I really just enjoy being here I love my roommates. I love my friends. I love where I live. I love cooking my own food. It is funny the things you learn to appreciate in life. I love Utah State. I love the life I live and live the life I love.

Oh and here's a hint about being happy, it is really easy. Just remember that no matter what is happening in the world or your life, it could always be worse. So help someone out, their situation may be worse than yours, and helping them could be the thing that will make both of your days :)

NO ONE LIKES A FROWNY FACE, CHANGE IT FOR A SMILE, MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE BY SMILING ALL THE WHILE. :)

It's the little things

Happiness to me is a flower blooming in the sun. Happiness to me is seeing the stars on a clear night. It is a smile on someone's face, a laugh heard down the hall, a balloon, a good talk with a friend, and a silly joke. Happiness is not being rich and famous or strong and smart. It is not fulfilling huge amounts of tasks, or getting an A+ on all of your tests. Sure those things are nice, but what do you do when that fame goes away? Or you go broke? Or you grow old and weak? How about you miss your A+ by a percent? What do you do then? If you learn to find joy in the little things in life, you can learn to be happy no matter what. So take time this week to notice the little things, rejoice in them, and then share them with a friend. Happiness is the most contagious virus on the Earth, so let's spread it! Remember, No one likes a Frowny Face, Change it to a smile! :)

Why Blog?

Recently it has come to my attention that people are just so unhappy with the way things are going in their life, and they complain to others about it. I very much dislike when people are sad, upset, or happy, and I dislike it even more when they complain and try to make other people upset with it as well. Since this is often the case, I decided to write a blog about happiness and joy and how to find it in your life :) I hope you enjoy and that it puts a smile on your face!