F is for Friends who do stuff together!

I absoutely have terrible luck with friends. At least I did growing up. But guess what? That changed when I moved to college. I have made life changing friends up here at USU. I think I will try and add pictures and all that jazz to emphasize just how great my friends are! :)

 This is Sammy Dean. She is one of my very best friends. 

We were roommates last year and I just LOVE her! :) 

 Meet Michaela. She and I shared a reoom and are friends by default. I am glad I met her and know I can trust her :) 

 First off, these people are AMAZING. I love each and everyone of them! 

This is Central Campus AG from last year and man oh man. Most greatest awesomeest people ever!!!

 Oh man! What a great day this was! The 315ers are seriously amazing! :)

Jaret Danger Wilson. He is a stud!

 We really did become a family last year! :) So glad each of these girls are in my life! 

And that Jaret was always there for me! :) 

 My best friends from last year. Amberly is on the right then Sammy then me! I just love em all! :)

 These ladies I met this summer and they helped me through a lot! This is when we went hiking through the narrows and I lost a contact while swimming! So much fun! :)

My Pondersa Family! These people are each great in their own way!

:)  

 Amberly, Nicole, and I. Man. We had some fun times! :) They helped make my freshman year great!

 Well, we know we can't make fried ice cream hahaha! 

The three amigos! Yeah, we rock! 

Tasha, Amberly and Perla!

 Killer Chickens. Need I say more? 

This girl is HILARIOUS. Love her. 

 Taylor Smith. She kept me sane this summer! :) 

 Favorite friends is right. This is Monique McElvany. She is my very very best friend. I love her SO much. I seriously would NOT be able to get through the day without her in my life! I LOVE her!!! 

 Remember how I said some of these friends are life changing? This man certainly is! 

Kenneth James Fryar-Ludwig. 

The kind of guy that would call you at one in the morning to make sure you were okay. 

The kind of guy who treated EVERYONE with such amazing respect and kindness that he never had people who didn't like him. 

The kind of man that was willing to change his life around just so that he could serve the lord for two years. Kenny is one of the greatest examples to me and he always will be. I love him, and am so glad he came into my life and helped make a difference! :) 

 Me and Amberly again :) 

This is Umut. He helped me through my senior year. I am so glad he is in my life! 

Ich liebe dich, Umut! :) 

Apparently this kid and I don't have any pictures together? That should change. hahaha!

This is Brice Robert Colby. 

He has become another one of those life- changing friends. The kind you wanna keep around because they help you be a better person. 

This is a drawing Brice's friend did of him and it's like my favorite. I like it because Brice and I are very similar in many ways. It's sometimes scary how alike we can be. 

I've come to find that friends tend to have the same likes and dislikes as you and he and I surely match up in a  lot of these. We both HATE shoes, love nerdy things, and LOVE frisbee. He taught me to throw a frisbee and I am pretty sure that's when I decided I wanted to be his friend! :) hahaha

I love this picture! It includes some of my SLC AG members, some SLC staff and a whole lot of our true personalities showing :)

These people are the reason I do what I do. They are why I work so hard to have a successful AG. They are why I am AG president (literally and figuratively) and they are some of the greatest examples of wonderful people I have ever met!

I LOVE this picture. It cracks me up! Jordan Ames is one fiesty little thing. She knows how to have fun, be outrageous, but be a friend. She is quite the great lady and I am glad I know her :) 

My Wasatch Warriors!

Man, the people in this picture are all just SO awesome! They live in the same building as me and they are so fun! I love the community we have and the person they help me become! :)

Now, some of my friends are not mentioned. Mostly because we do not have pictures together! One I certainly need to talk about is Zakk Lanphear. This kid is crazy. He is so fun to be around and he always puts a smile on my face. I love hangin out with him and I love that he takes me for who I am :) 

Debryn Saunders, we sure do have some pictures together but well they are hidden! I just love her. She is my "RA" but she is my friend. I know that I was supposed to live in Wasatch Hall because I was supposed to be her roommate!

Mandy Maughan. Man she's a keeper. So much fun to be around like all the time. I just love her and I hope she knows that! :) 

Kaydee, Tenille, Jordan. These three are so much fun. Seriously love living with them. It's such a great thing to live with people who make you laugh! :) 

If you didn't get mentioned, know I still love you, I just have to take my lunch break now! hahaha! :) 

So, advice for today? Quit wondering when you are going to get that "best friend" and allow yourself to realize the great people who are all around you. They are there, just look. I sure am blessed with my friends!

As always, no one likes a frowny face, so share a smile and you may just meet someone new to add to your list! :) 

Confused? Me too.

Recently in my life I have felt so much confusion. Seriously SO much confusion. It's been weird for me because I am normally the girl with her head on her shoulders and a confident sparkle in her eyes. I didn't know what the heck was wrong until today. Today I realized that I wasn't realizing my worth. I was busy worrying about how much I could accomplish on my to-do list and not about why I was doing the things on it. I wasn't doing them because I wanted to but because I had to. I lost my passion and I lost sight of the love I have for life. Sounds like I am one of those cheesy, overly cliche people doesn't it? Well I am and I love that. I forgot the important thing is why I am doing what I do and who I am doing it for. My resolve is to find that passion again and that excitement and continue it! :)

CONTAINS RELIGION:
I never want to sound pushy or like I am forcing my beliefs on anyone, but it would be a discredit to my Savior and the person I am if I did not acknowledge how learning I am a child of God again has helped me. I go to church every Sunday. I pray each night before bed and I read my scriptures often, but sometimes I forget this wonderful little fact that I am a daughter of God. Today at church, I was pretty much slapped in the face by it. Every lesson, every talk, every prayer was about how I am a daughter of God and how I am loved. This is another resolve I have. I need to realize how influential this knowledge can be in my life and embrace and accept it. I am a child of God. I need to live this way and I surely will! :)

PS, if you want to know this truth, or more about how I know I am a child of God, go to www.mormon.org and find out, or just ask me. Either way it may be worth your time! :)

So, piece of take away for today's blog? Find your passion. Focus on why you are doing things instead of the fact that they must be done. Learn the truths that make you you. Follow your beliefs and find out what truly matters. And as always, keep on smiling; no one likes a frowny face! :)

You are Beautiful.

Body image.  What does this mean to you? Is it how you view yourself? Is it how you view your life? Is it how other view you? What does this mean? To me, body image is a combination of all of these, but it really all comes down to mostly one thing and that is how you feel about yourself.
Now, I know how hard it is to live in a society that portrays perfectly shaped, beautifully sculpted people and not feel like you fail because you aren't as pretty as them. There have been very long periods of time in my life where I have felt that failure. Where I haven't believed in myself as a beautiful person, but over time, that changed. I can now look in the mirror and call myself beautiful despite the fact that I do not wear size 0 pants. I can smile at myself and know that I am a good looking girl despite my less than pearly white teeth. What is portrayed to be beautiful in society is not what really is beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so allow yourself to see your beauty. There are some things I have learned in life that have helped me to be confident in who I am and be able to see myself as beautiful. The first is to stop calling yourself names. How many times have you woken up looked in the mirror and said "ew." Stop that right now. Don't focus on what you don't like about yourself, focus on what you do like. Give yourself compliments. When your hair looks good, tell yourself that. It is okay to admit to yourself that you have great features!
The second thing to do is accept compliments from others. Now, I have a terrible time accepting recognition, but I have learned that accepting compliments when others give them to you is a good thing. You then begin to remember them and are happier. This also helps you build stronger relationships with people.
Next, you need to stop talking and start doing. This may be the hardest step, but you can do it. If you don't like how much you weigh, then exercise and eat right more. Don't sit around complaining and hoping the pounds will magically melt away, get off your couch and do something about it. Take the initiative to change what you feel needs to change to make yourself feel better.
Then, you must never never never compare. You cannot be the same person as your roommate, or Jennifer Lopez, or anyone. You are you. Learn to accept that fact and then go with it. When you stop wishing you looked like someone else and start recognizing the amazing things about the way that you look, life will improve.
Lastly, remember that you are special. I know this gets made fun of a lot, but seriously you are special. You are special because you are you. There is only one Tasha Mae Killian in the entire world, the entire universe. There is only one of me, so I am going to try to make that Tasha the best she can be. There is only one of you in the world, so accept yourself for who you are, what you look like and move forward because the role you play in this world is you, not someone else.

And for my favorite tip, no matter what you look like, a smile can make your look a thousand times better because no one likes a frowny face! :)

The secret to making friends.

So, this blog is going to be about something I have struggled with my entire life. That is friends. I don't know why I have had such a tough experience with friendships, but I have. Recently I have been thinking about why friendships are important and how to make them. Like I said, I am not the best at this but I 'm gonna give it a shot.
The first part of making friends is talking. I know this sounds like a duh answer but you would be surprised by how many people don't know that is part of making friends. You can't just walk up to someone and become best friends. You can't even go to someone you've known for a year and be friends. You have to talk to each other. I mean really talk. Get to know the person. They may not be willing to tell you a whole lot, but they can tell you things that you can relate to and in return you can tell them things that they can relate to. When you have a real conversation with someone you are beginning a friendship.
Next you need to laugh at their jokes. Now, don't be super outrageous, but if there is something funny said, realize it is okay to laugh. I have a theory that everyone wants to be funny. We all want to be laughed at... hahaha ... that sounded bad, but we do. When we say a funny joke, we want someone to acknowledge it. So, laugh when someone says something funny. It will make their day and in return they will laugh at you!
Next you need to make them a priority. Prioritizing is seriously one of the hardest things for me to do, but I am starting to learn that in many ways people come first. It's alright to sacrifice an hour of your sleeping time to help a friend with a presentation. It's okay to share your dinner with someone who is looking for a pal. It's okay to put off studying  to play a short game of Frisbee. It's okay to make the people you want to be a priority, become a priority. If you learn that people can come first people will realize that you care an in turn they will care for you.
Last you need to learn that everyone matters. There are people who have a very small role in the world that still matter. On top of realizing that everyone matters, realize that you matter. Mattering means a lot. It means that someone cares about you. This is true for every single person. There is ALWAYS someone who cares. It may not feel like it, but there is. By realizing that everyone matters you begin to see people for who they are instead of dwelling on their flaws. It's such a great thing when someone thanks you for caring about them. If you begin to see the worth of people and realize that they matter, they will feel your care and be drawn to you.

Now, going back to what I said at the beginning. I am, by no means, the expert on friendships, but I do know how to let people know they are important and someone cares and that is what a friendship is all about. So, next time you meet someone try using some of these skills. See how it works. And remember, the best way to be coming friends with someone is to never have a frowny face. Always share a smile! :)

The Time, The Time, Who Has the Time? :)

Time. Such a small and simple 4 letter word, but such a large meaningful thing to take in. It is what is on my mind today. In fact, there was a very strong thought in my mind that I could not go without thinking about. This thought was, "It's time to manage your time." I have felt a bit stretched out with all the things I have to do and the amount of time I have to do it in. This has become a serious problem. I wish I could tell you how I can fix this, but I really don't know yet. It is something I plan to work on and in the future I will give you an update.
Another thing that has been on my mind is how precious time really is. If I spend ten minutes on something that is a time waster...facebook... then that is ten minutes I can never get back. Really makes you think about what is important. Recently there have been a few things that I have had to choose between. For example, do I stay up late building relationships with friends, or go to bed and allow myself time to feel refreshed? It's a tough thing to be constantly aware of what you are doing with your time, but try to think about it. How much happier could you be if you decided to take a walk instead of playing video games? Or to study your assignment instead of stalking on Facebook. This is also something I need to work on. Life goes by quickly, so really live each moment in a worthwhile way. (PS, I hate when people say live each moment as your last because honestly if this was my last moment I would be having some epic adventure and in all reality your life cannot be made up of very epic constant moments, so if you live each moment in a worthwhile way then your life will be fulfilling)
My last thought on time, let it be on your side. Time is something I used to hate. I am not very patient and I still have issues waiting, but sometimes waiting is necessary. If you have never stood in line and waited for something you really wanted and then been totally satisfied with that waiting, you can never appreciate that thing fully. Also, you cannot appreciate instant gratification to its fullest if you have never waited. Waiting can be fun. If you are waiting for something big, enjoy life and the lessons it teaches while you are waiting. If you are waiting for something simple, learn to enjoy this wait by entertaining yourself, meeting new people, and just enjoying having time to anticipate the good. Time can be your friend. Rushing and fast-pacedness (totally made that word up) are not always the best. So enjoy the wait and time will become your ally in life.

Time is interesting. It is hard to manage, hard to prioritize, hard to make worthwhile, but can be your ally, friend, and teacher in life. Don't hate time and time won't hate you. Realize that it's time to manage your time and begin realizing what you need to do in order to make your time is spent in the best way possible.
Remember, no one likes a frowny face. Turn it around and smile some more! :)

Two posts in one week, say what?

If you're like me and can't read tons cuz you get bored, feel free to skip down to the advice at the bottom. I won't be offended. I promise!

So, I don't have much time before I rush off to pass my German test, but I just wanna share a few thoughts regarding a cemetery. It is Halloween and all. So recently I have been constantly getting asked if I was alright. At first it was by like a billion people. Then it was by just the few who know me very well. For some reason all these questions lead me to two realizations. The first one was that something really was off, despite my answer and the second was that people truly care. Those are the two topics for today. 

So, Something being off: Well I knew that something was missing, but i didn't know what. It was really hard to figure out because, honestly that has never happened to me before. Well, as I was thinking about how to get back on track and what was missing, I realized something. I hadn't been doing one of the things that makes me the happiest. I learned in class a couple weeks ago that we each have eight basic needs in life, but to go along with that we each have things in our life that we need. Now, I'm not talking needs like the I need to eat a banana before work everyday needs I am talking like I need to have me time or I need to talk with a certain friend needs. My personal needs had to do with reading. Sounds weird right? Well it's not. I love to read uplifting materials. Generally these materials are religious, but not always. I read self-help books, joke books, and just positive things that put a smile on my face. Recently, because of my busy life, I have neglected that reading. Well no more. If you love doing something and it makes you happy then do it. Don't say it's not a priority because it is. You are a priority. Sure there are other things in life that are also important but you need to realize you are also important and that there are things you need to do for yourself. :)

Now, onto the second. People really do care: A few years back I thought that I knew what it meant to have someone care about you. I had a friend that cared and made sure I had what I needed and that I was happy, but there was something missing. What was missing was feeling. Recently, I have had multiple friends questions me and how I am doing. They showed that they cared. It was really a great thing for me to realize. Caring is great. Along with knowing others care you need to care for yourself as well. I always set super high standards for myself and it always brings me down. I realized today that no one expects me to be perfect. No one expects me to be anything other than the best me I can be, and that my friends, is a great feeling. 

So things to take away from this today (this will be helpful if you didn't feel like reading all that jazz)

1. Do something you like to do. Don't worry about how it will effect the other areas of your life, or what people will think because that doesn't matter. What matters is you. If you are doing something that makes you happy, then everything else will fall into place. So get your priorities straight and realize that you need to take care of yourself as well. 

2. Let people care. Let them into your life and let them ask if you are alright. Realize that there is emotion behind this and the emotion is concern. It is not a stale, annoying, or invalidated question. Appreciate the care and accept it. 

2.5. Care about yourself. Realize that you cannot do it all one-hundred percent perfectly. Realize that no one cares if you can't do it perfectly and no one expects you to. Don't give yourself limits you cannot achieve. Allow yourself to realize that the best is all anyone wants, and you doing your best is all anyone needs. Be your best self and that will always be good enough. 

Last but never least, no one likes a frowny face, so smile. If you do, you will be more atttractive, happier, and have more friends... and that fellow bloggers, is all anyone can ask for! :)

SLC AG is Poppin'

Well a whole lot has happened in my life recently. I was elected as Area Government (on campus housing student council type thing...) president and have been SO busy! I sure do love doing this! I have probably the greatest advisor in the history of advisors. This is no exaggeration. Brice Colby is his name, and zombies are his game... hahaha! He is not only one way cool kid, but one very entertaining person. Despite how much I tease him about different things, he sure is one of the greatest, most put together leaders I have ever met. I am so excited to finally get into the nitty gritty of AG this year and start to become the best leader I can be while helping those in my AG also become the greatest leaders they can. :) Basically SLC AG is poppin! :) Speaking of AG, there is a lovely little thing we do in the fall called the AG retreat. It is one of the most life changing, eye opening, emotionally draining weekends you will ever live through. I know this sounds super not like a lot of fun, but it is actually quite the opposite. This is my second AG retreat I have attended and I really was sort of confused after leaving it. I really didn't know how to feel. Last year I was so uplifted and ready to move on and this year I was just confused. It took a while... okay like maybe 6 hours... after leaving to help me feel that uplifted feeling. Emotions are so crazy. They are always there and always so very prominent. You can feel so much happiness, sadness, or anger and then five minutes later feel the complete opposite. I used to say I wish we didn't feel. I wish that we didn't have emotions, but they are necessary. You could never care for someone without emotions. Never learn to control anger. Never learn to suppress jealousy. Never learn to   love or be happy. Most importantly, we would never learn to or be able to connect with other people. Emotions are necessary. They make us who we are and allow us to be what we need to be.

That was a tangent I really didn't need to go off on. Basically after the AG retreat I have a few new goals. Those goals include getting to truly know people. Less poor me and more helping. More real friends and less superficial ones. Less hidden emotion and more shared feelings. Less hostility and more friendliness. Write poetry again. Less distractions and more focus. Basically there is still a whole lot I need to work on, a whole lot that can help me improve the person that I am and a whole lot of emotions that I need to accept and allow to happen.

So, piece of advice for staying happy this blog is, don't shut yourself off. Don't close yourself down. Show some emotion. Share a problem with a friend. Allow people to care about you. You cannot get through life alone so don't try. Even if you think there is no one out there who cares, there always is. Next time someone asks "what's wrong?" or "Are you alright?" give them an answer. Let them be your friend. You will be happier if you do this and that my friends is a promise.

As always, I hope you enjoyed my random array of thoughts and emotions. Remember, No one likes a frowny face!